A Grace Disguised


A Grace Disguised: How the Soul Grows Through Loss [GRACE DISGUISED EXPANDED/E] Paperback – January 31, 2005
Author: ID: B001TIBIG2

Self-help; growing through the loss of a loved one.

PaperbackPublisher: Zondervan Publishing Company (January 31, 2005)ID: B001TIBIG2 Best Sellers Rank: #1,292,573 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)
Personal Impact

A Grace Disguised by Gerald Sittser has impacted me in a rare and profound way. Never have I read a book that tackles the heart of the issue of suffering and the heart of humanity harmoniously and with such eloquence as Sitter’s. Sittser engages his audience by peeling away the layers of his thought and into the depths of the pain that he suffered when his mother, wife, and youngest daughter were killed instantly after a head-on collision with a drunk driver. It is plain to see that he has spent countless hours in agony, reasoning out his thoughts, struggling with his faith, and just in living an ordinary life after the accident. The reader is a helpless and captive audience as he describes how he dealt with spiritual issues such as faith in God’s sovereignty and emotional issues such as the inability to forgive. Through it all, Sittser recognized that he can never get over the tragedy, but he can allow it to grow him through the choices he makes in response to it.

Personally, by the grace of God, I have never had to experience the mental, emotional, and spiritual anguish of such a tragedy. But after reading this book, I know that I am better prepared to deal with any such occurrence in my life for the future. Sittser’s writing made me admire the resiliency of the human spirit, and also appreciate the role of faith in overcoming devastating loss. Sittser was able to overcome his anguish largely because of his well-grounded faith in the promises of God, and his faith in the absolute standards of morality and justice of which God is the source. I can only hope to be able to handle catastrophic losses (which he points out are inevitable) with such grace and sound mind.
…when I received the phone call. I had stayed home from church with a sore heel when I picked up my phone to see my best friend was calling. It wasn’t her though, it was someone else–her mother, calling to tell me that their dear girl was taken from us in a horrible accident. I had to break the news to one of her best friends, my daughter. The grief had our whole county reeling.

After the dust settled, the funeral and memorials done, the semester over, I had time at the bookstore to comb through all the books on grief. Of course I looked over Lewis and the other major Christian writers, but they weren’t of much use to myself and my pain. Lewis–God bless him–lost a wife to cancer after she had a full life. Our girl was 11.

Sittser knows grief. He knows sudden, horrible, irrevocable death; trauma, tragedy and loss. Loss with a capital L. He lost his wife, his four-year-old daughter and his mother before his eyes during a drunk driving accident. As a well-respected Fuller seminarian, he was encouraged by his friends to write down his observation and addressed the concept and effects of catastrophic loss a full three years after the accident.

Now that I have said why this book was relative to me, let me tell you why it’s relative to you and everyone you know: he makes one thing firm–loss is loss, and cannot be qualified as more or less. He does not feel that his loss was greater than anyone else’s, for all loss is relative to the person who is doing the losing, whether that someone’s a parent, a unemployed mom, or a father trying to cope with his children after divorce. He clearly states that losing a job, for instance, is a loss. Rape is a loss. Divorce is a loss. Death constitutes a loss. Loss is loss is loss.

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